I in Team

Growing up I think just about every coach or mentor I had at least one time during the journey stated "There is no I in Team." To tell you the truth as a young immature athlete or growing business professional I never really gave credit or thought to that statement. At the end of the day I think I was selfish enough to believe that the world revolved around myself and only myself. That the only way to get stuff accomplished was to throw everything onto my shoulders and push forward. Of course there were major accomplishments along the way but now looking back on it I failed a lot also. What I can also look back upon is that with each accomplishment I unconsciously at the time had a team in place and when I failed it was typically because I was to stubborn to reach out and ask for help when needed. Instead of asking a team member for assistance I would pile on the tasks and become over crowded with deadlines and tasks steering me away from success.

Any one that knows me knows that running and triathlon are my hobbies and passions in life. The time management, personal goal setting, commitment to excellence and extremely deep soul searching that happens during these events constantly drives me to do better. Most people would also look at these activities as an individual sport and while I agree slightly I believe it takes a team to accomplish your dreams. I know that when every Ironman race roles around I need my family to support me number one, I need the help of a coach to help set a plan in place, I need friends who are better than me to push me outside my comfort zone, I need a sports medicine staff to keep me healthy and most importantly I need my chosen circle of support to constantly give me the energy and motivation to succeed.

The picture above is from my daughters rock star cross country team who this weekend will be competing at the youth cross country national championships. It would be easy for these young girls to get caught up in the fact that running is a very individual sport however they understand the need for the team. They know that every runner counts towards success. Before their last regional race this awesome group of girls developed some team chants to try and get in the minds of the other runners. To show that other runners need to watch out for our team and not just individual runners.

So before you take on the next task at work, plan for your next race or just simply develop goals for 2015. I suggest you look around you and see what team members you have in place. A healthy team atmosphere can help you reach the peak of success faster than if you try and do everything yourself. It is also healthy from time to time to reward you team with gratitude letting them know how important they are to your success.

On a side note thanks to everyone who had donated to my Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation Ironman Lake Placid project. No donation is to little and I would be grateful for every penny donated. You can click on the link at the top banner and it will take you directly to my page.

Make It Count!!!!

Proactive vs. Reactive

Everyday when we wake up immediately we are presented with choices as to whether your going to be proactive or reactive to choices and situations. I can go out on a limb and say that most people choose the second way of decided on their actions. Most people are reactive in their thoughts and most of those thoughts lead to negative thinking or results. No matter how intense the situation is reactive people make choices based on impulse where proactive people make choices based on values. 

Reactive people tend to never let go of anything. If someone treats them wrong or does not respond in a favorable way the reactive person tends to hold on to those thoughts and never forgive. The reactive person tends to judge immediately. The reactive person tends to spend most of their waking hours complaining how things are not fair. The reactive person tends to talk behind peoples back or complain about a person without confrontation. The reactive person tends to see the glass as half empty. The reactive person tends to always find the easy way out when the going gets tough. The reactive person tends to loose control easily thus making an easy situation difficult to handle. 

Proactive people on the other hand tend to make choices based on values. Proactive people typically always have the end goal in sight and take the necessary steps needed to get to that end goal without sacrificing an integral step needed for success. Proactive people recognize that they can't control everything but more tend to think about how the can control what they do about it. Proactive people never talk behind someones back but yet confront the individual and figure out a way that both can get along. The proactive person tends to see the glass as half full. The proactive person tends to daily make deposits into their account of returning favors and treating others with respect. The proactive individual tends to stay cool, calm and in control in every situation knowing that no matter what there is always a positive outcome. Proactive people tend to always learn from their mistakes. Proactive people tend to see the obstacle as the way in that every tough situation has a silver lining. 

My question to you is what kind of person are you? Are you the type that gets hot under the collar when someone cuts you off in traffic or do you just let it slide as there is nothing you can do about it? Are you the type that reads to much into an email or text instead of taking the time to fully understand the intent of the sender? Do you use language such as I can't instead of saying there has to be a way? Do you place blame on others instead of fully taking responsibility? I could go on forever with questions like this but I think you get the point. 

I like the picture above from this past weekends youth national cross country championships as I fully believe it relates to a proactive vs. reactive mindset. First let me set the stage for what was going on in this picture that the picture doesn't fully describe. As you can see from their dress its not warm outside. It was actually pretty cold with wind gusts up to 40 MPH. On top of that it was probably the hardest course they would race this whole season. Their mindset could easily been one of complaining the whole course walk about the weather, difficulty of the hills and they would rather be home playing. Instead as I walked behind these three girls all I heard was laughter and a constant strategy session. These girls where deciding where they would push it and where they would settle in. They where talking how they have trained all season for this moment and how there was nothing that could beat them today. Well I am happy to say that most of our team finished in the top 20 and we took the 2nd place overall team title. Can't wait to see what these strong girls do at nationals in a few weeks.

Next time a difficult time or decision arises I challenge you to think about what your reaction will be. Don't ever use language such as I can't but always know that you are capable to accomplishing anything you put your mind to. Figure out the steps needed for success. It may be a difficult road to get there but once the road map is in place stick to your guns and follow the steps needed to set you apart from the rest. 

Make It Count!!!!

Please also visit my link at the top of the page for my next project with the Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation. 

Talent

I was at a funeral this past weekend of one of the most amazing people ever and I must say that while it was sad to see her go it was also inspiring to hear the stories of how great a person she was. Stories of how she spread constant joy to everyone she came in contact with. How there was nothing that could bring her down and how she had the innate ability to always look at the good in something. I am sure that everyone in attendance walked away wanting to do better in life. I know I walked away wanting to take my abilities to the next level and leave a blueprint where people would talk the same about me when it is my time.

The other thing that caught my attention was during the service my wife's uncle was talking about Talent. How we are all put on this earth with varying talents and abilities to do great. How as we embark on the journey of life we should emphasize those talents and share them with everyone who's path we cross.

Now I have come across plenty of people/patients in my life that either their talent has never truly been discovered or their confidence is not strong enough to use their talents. Often we go through life with blinders on or a deep sense of your not good enough for something. Well I am here to tell you that is a crap way of thinking. We are all amazing individuals at the core and this is something that needs to be built upon. I understand that confidence is a huge varying factor that comes into play. I also understand that the only way to build confidence is to practice your talent. Make it a game to every single day work and work and work and when you feel tired work a little more upon making your talent an ingrained part of who you are.

I have often in my 38 years now (thanks everyone for the wishes yesterday) thought about what are my talents and what am I really good at. Well I know without a doubt that there is three things that are the fabric of who I am. The first one (and I probably owe this to growing up with mostly females) is my ability to listen. To truly listen means not think of a response or interject before the person is done talking but to truly open up and take in every word that the person is saying. Next I will have to say is my ability to be calm when times get tough. Think about it...lets say your in a stressful situation and what typically gets you through those times...running around frantic and surrounded by frantic people or being able to breath and take in the moment along with people who are thinking of the next step to solve the problem. I know my patients appreciate my ability to listen and be calm while always thinking of the positive.

The last talent I think I excel at and is the talent that I am most proud of is my ability to be a father/husband. No offense to anyone but being a family man is the single most important thing in my life. I wake up in the morning and the first thing I think of is how I can be a better father/husband today. Is there something I did wrong yesterday and I can do better today? My wife knows that my three girls mean the world to me and every second I get to spend with them is the equivalent to winning the lottery. When they have sporting events, plays, etc...I am constantly nervous as I want nothing but the best for them. Now don't get me wrong in saying that I am the perfect spouse or father. It is something that has to be constantly worked upon and evolved. The great thing is that when you are passionate about your talent you are always open to improving upon your craft. Communication within my family upon is crucial to how well we perform. When you make yourself available to your family they 100% know that no matter what you are are always there for them.

So what are your talents? Are you aware of them or are you still on a quest to figure them out? If you already know do you make your talents a part of who you are each day? Focus on how great you are and make sure you are sharing your talents with the world.

One day I want people to sit in a congregation or room and laugh, cry and talk about how great a person I was and how it led them down a path of leading a better life.

Make It Count!!!!

GiGi

Have you ever come across someone who captured the essence of what living life to the fullest really meant? Have you ever had a conversation with someone and wished deep down that the conversation would never end due to the amazing insight from the individual? Have you ever been in someones presence and knew without a doubt that you had their full attention no matter the distraction going on in the background? Have you ever had the pleasure of unconditional love and immediate welcoming from your spouses family? Finally have you ever seen someone treat everyone equally with love and not judging that person just because they don't fit in or are just a little different? Well I can answer all of these questions with yes I have and could go on with a million more positive qualities but I think you understand the trend. 

This past weekend the world lost this amazing person as she is now in heaven looking down on us. She may not be with us anymore but there is so much that we can learn from her and carry on her legacy through our daily actions. She was always about loving your family hard, strong and forever as they are the ones that will always be there for you. She was one of the few I have ever seen enter a room and immediately be drawn in by everyone in attendance. There was something about the energy that she had that engulfed everyone's emotions. I never wanted the moments to end when we visited as I always felt like a better person and wanting to do more after talking with GiGi. 

I met GiGi about 12 years ago when I was blessed to meet the love of my life in my wife. 12 years may not seem like a lot of time but let me tell you that the memories are enough to fill a lifetime. I am jealous of my wife's family that they got the chance to grow up with her and I can only hope that the stories, memories and desire to be great will guide them the rest of their life. 

While I love that I had the chance to meet her I am over the moon filled with joy that all three of my daughters got to spend quality time with GiGi. As you can see in the pictures below they loved playing cards with her as well as just hearing the stories of her youth. Although I think my youngest just loved the fact that GiGi always wore such showy bangles which she more or less wanted to just chew on. 

What I want her to know is that I loved her like she was my own grandmother. She was one of the most incredible person. The energy that she portrayed and brought to everything she did I can see in her granddaughter Britt. She passed on to Britt an ability to love life, care immensely for others and take over a room with positive energy when she enters. She always told us never to settle but always follow what your heart tells you. While tears had been shed during this hard time there were also tears of joy knowing how lucky we are to have had the luxury of spending time with her. 

We know what kind of legacy GiGi left behind. If something happened to you tomorrow what kind of legacy would you leave behind? Is it one that you can be proud of or do you have a desire to be better? The good news is its never to late. Start right now while reading this with goals and an attitude of change. Do the little things needed so that when its your time someone will talk about how great you were and how it inspired them to be a better person. 

We love you GiGi and you will forever be in our hearts, thoughts and laughter. 

Make It Count!!!!

Two very, very incredible women

I think she is tickling my ear

She loved watching this one

Our little piece of heaven in Maine

Teaching the girls a little strategy

This picture says it all

At 96 she could fill a room with stories and spunk

My mom had the joy of GiGi

Three influential women in my life and very Beautiful

Nap time

She could always spread laughter

Always a smile

Love these two women more than they will ever know

All In

Every week I think I am going to run out of ideas or thoughts to share with everyone but then life, family and just being in the right place at the right time presents me with inspiration to share what I think it means to Make It Count!!!

Before I get into the details let me just say that if you live anywhere near Howard County Maryland that I 110% recommend the Howard County Junior Striders XC program. I think its a top notch group of coaches and people that number care about the kids having fun and using running as the outlet. I am biased to the sport of cross country as I think it breeds some amazing individuals. Cross country running instills confidence, a sense of team and individual accomplishments, an intelligent numbers/strategy minded kid and most of all the ability to push yourself farther than you ever thought.

This past weekend was special because it was the first time this year that both of my girls had the opportunity to race in the same meet (the oldest has commitments to soccer). I will not lie but I was nervous all weekend as my girls mean the world to me and I want nothing but success for them. I know there will be times of failure and I will be the first one there to teach them how failure can be success in disguise.

Brynn was up first and you could right away tell she was excited to show her big sister how it was done. She has placed third overall in every meet this year so when she came across in 4th place we thought she just didn't have her best day until we saw the times and realized she took 35 SECONDS off her personal best. Who does that? I told her it was the best race of the year for her and even though she got 4th she gave it her all. The spotlight now turned on Avery for her first XC race ever and in true Avery fashion she got out of the gate fast and within 200 yards had about a 20 yard lead which she carried all the way until the finally 50 meters when second place surged and caught her. I was completely blown away at her ability and willingness to go for it. Her racing intelligence will come as she progresses in time and lets not forget she is only 8.

Watching the two of them race led me to my topic today. Both of them went ALL IN on the race and decided to hold nothing back. When they finished neither one of them was upset or discouraged but knew they gave it all they had and there best on this particular day and that is all that matters. Why not approach life like this also? Why don't you wake up each morning and go ALL IN with the day and future goals? What is holding you back? I know as I have progressed through life I have put forth everything I have and have gone ALL IN. I don't want to reach a stage 1 month, 1 year, 20 years and so forth where I look back and said man I wish I would have done that. We are blessed with an unknown amount of time in this world so grasp the time you have and go forward with the mindset of ALL IN. My wife and I probably cram more into a single week but everything we do has the end goal of building us stronger as individuals and a family.

There is one other person that is the epitome of what it means to go ALL IN. My wife's grandmother who could very well be the most amazing individual I have ever had the luxury of spending time with. She turned 96 years young this summer and over the past 12 years I would like to say I have developed a bond with her in which she would consider me one of her own. At 96 she may be a little slow physically but her mind has the ability to entertain you 24/7 and if you don't watch out she will even joke on you. The reason I know she has gone ALL IN during her life time is from her stories and her abilities to always make me want to be a better man. She lived a life as a Broadway actress and I truly believe that she looks at life in the same fashion...a life of always being in character and spreading the good word of don't sweat the little things but instead take whats good in the world and cherish it. At my wedding reception 11 years ago the first dance with my wife was special but I will say (sorry Britt) that the time dancing with GiGi made me sweat, laugh and know that we are in charge of how we approach life. I know this won't make much sense but every single time I have seen her since then the first things out of my mouth are "Da Da Da Dee Dee Da....Hello Beautiful!!!" She unfortunately is in not the best of health as I type this so please whomever reads this please send your prayers. My hope is she can read this and know that she has touched my life deeply in a way that I will forever make sure I am taking care of my family and not living a day without going ALL IN.

So take away from this whatever you choose but know you are the only person capable of your actions. Take the higher road please and always Make It Count!!!!

If you can please also read my project for the next year and give what you can.

http://support.themmrf.org/site/TR/EnduranceEvents/EnduranceEvents?px=1781288&pg=personal&fr_id=1730

Courage

There are many definitions of courage these days and also countless ways we go about approaching courage in our daily lives. I am going to embellish on one avenue of courage that I think is important to the success in our lives and the ability to make a difference.

Do you wake up in the morning with the courage or the fight to tackle anything that comes your way? Do you start the morning goal oriented towards knowing what the day is going to need out of you to be successful? Or do you wake up with high levels of stress worried or scared that you will not be able to succeed with what you have on your plate? Do you skirt around the issues or do you attack the obstacle in your way with 100% confidence that as long as you give life your best then nothing else matters?

The picture above is how I try and start my day every day out of the year. My little princess wakes up with this smile everyday and while I know she is only one she has no worries as to what the day or the future holds. Why can't we as adults do the same. What holds us back from the ability to wake up each day with a smile and the strength to fight beyond the minimum requirements so that we lead a life rich in experiences. Why worry about the future when you its more important to live in the present.

I guess this is my definition of courage...the ability to know that you are a strong individual, the ability to accomplish anything you put your mind to, the resistance to never give up when things get tough instead push harder and know quitting is not part of who you are and most of all like my daughters say as long as you always give your best nothing else matters.

Most of us stress over the smallest details...i.e. loosing that 5-10 extra pounds, when am I going to fit in exercise, I have no clothes that look good on me, the weather is terrible, I had a bad race, that person was mean to me and so on and so on. Now imagine going out for a run and collapsing because your heart stopped and when you came to finding out your heart condition has gotten worse or going to the doctor because your not feeling well and after some tests finding out you have cancer or your a single parent of two kids and you get laid off from your job...I know someone in each of these categories and many more with similar situations and the one thing they all have in common is courage. Each and every one of them came back a stronger individual knowing that while life is fragile they are stronger and will maximize the time they have. When life threw them a curve they reacted and knocked the ball our of the park in the sense of strength of courage and ability to spread that courage and the never quit mentality to those around them.

I agree in the sense that sometimes things just dont seem fair and the world will feel like its closing in. I can however tell you with confidence that if you step back for one second, reassess and bring your circle of strength (family, friends and confidence) closer to you then things will seem easier. The options of success and avenues out of those tough times will be plentiful.

Finally thanks to everyone who has donated to my Multiple Myeloma Research Foundation 2015 Ironman Lake Placid drive. To start the first week off with a bang and more 9 months left to raise as much money as I can I feel honored to have such amazing people in my life. Please think about donating to such an amazing cause that helps drive research to help people diagnosed with this incurable disease.

http://support.themmrf.org/site/TR/EnduranceEvents/EnduranceEvents?px=1781288&pg=personal&fr_id=1730

In closing always try and "Make It Count"

Impossible

This past weekend after a long EXHAUSTING day of driving all over the state cheering on our daughters in the activities they love my wife and I kicked our feet up and turned on the first movie that came up. When the TV came on the movie "The Impossible" was starting so we snuggled in. All we knew about the movie was that it was the real life betrayal of the 2004 tsunami that hit Thailand causing extreme devastation. What we didn't know was how powerful the movie was going to be and how much it makes you recognize how fragile like is. The movie is about a family (any time kids are involved it pulls at my heart strings) who is on vacation enjoying the simple joys of life and in a second life changed pushing them to the extreme limits of life and death. I won't ruin the movie for those of you who have not seen the movie and if you haven't seen the movie then I recommend watching it as its a great real life story on how fragile our world and life is. When the tsunami hit Thailand it caused extreme destruction and massive casualty. For those who survived the initial wall of water the next challenge was given to them in what seemed like the impossible quest to find loved ones and safety for themselves.  

I won't pretend I can relate to what these people went through during this horrific accident and my heart goes out to every single person that lost a loved one during this event. What I will say is I know all of us have gone through struggles in our life and many times we put an initial constraint on ourselves which makes whats going on seem impossible to overcome. Whether its a health struggle, financial crisis, extreme self doubt, stressful job or lack of support from family/friends I want you to know that deep down you have what it takes to overcome what seems impossible.

I am a realist knowing that some diseases are incurable and treatment is either palliative or available to extend life longer. While I am not personally fighting a disease I know that myself and many of you can do a little extra so those that are battling diseases like cancer know that the diagnosis is not the end and with our support anything is possible. I am not sure that in my lifetime we will figure out a cure for most cancers but what I do know is that as long as I am breathing I can do everything I can do to make it possible.

As always I have to give a reference to my children as they are my personal psychologist to positive thinking in life. My two older girls who are 8 and 6 have developed what they call "The Oergel Mantra" and it goes as follows "If you give everything you do your best then the outcome doesn't matter as long as you know you did everything you could." I assume they have gathered these thoughts via listening to their parents but I also know that whats so amazing about our youth is they don't put limits on their action and they believe everything is possible. The photo at the top is my oldest this summer in a duathlon. At this point in the race there were no visible racers in front of her but as you can tell by the facial expressions she didn't give up until she crossed the finish line.

I also know that building a solid support system through your friends and family will allow you the support to always pursue your dream. Of course their will be times when something arises that seems like a road block but the support from your circle will give you that extra confidence to bypass anything difficult.

In the movie there were many road blocks along the way that seemed to distract the survivors from finding safety or family. The key to success though was to never give up and keep pushing past the obstacles or failures knowing that constant/consistent efforts increase your chances of success.

Thanks for taking the time to read my blog as it means a lot to me.

Please also check out my fundraising page at:

http://support.themmrf.org/site/TR/EnduranceEvents/EnduranceEvents?px=1781288&pg=personal&fr_id=1730

Make It Count!!!